Friday, January 9, 2009

Who Are You Accountable To - Part III

Who Are You Accountable To – Part Three

Thank you for coming back to part three of this post! I hope that you have been able to think about the importance of this topic and have taken the time to pray about people you can talk to.
For some of you this is a new territory. Maybe you haven’t had the courage in the past to talk to a friend about starting an accountability relationship. If you have not here are a few things I would recommend you look for in the person you want to become accountable with:

· Would you consider this person trustworthy? If you have told them something private in the past and “somehow” other people found out, then I would keep your relationship at a friendship level only.

· Look for someone whom you trust, and are mature in their faith and character, and from whom you can learn so you can develop closeness and share shortcomings! What you do not want is someone to discipline you who is prideful, who only cares about themselves, or who is irritable, presumptive, "too busy," and neglectful of others!

· Look for someone whom you already know or have a connection with such as a common interest or season in life.

So how do you get this started? Well here is how our group started (and also how I started all of the groups I was previously in).

· Always start SLOW
Since you might not know this person(s) you need to take it slow. In my current group we spent the first year just talking about nothing. We met for coffee, had breakfast or would meet for a play date. We took our time really getting to know each other, and let me tell you, it paid off. I am so close to these ladies now and I know it’s because we went slow and didn’t force and deep relationship. We let it unfold naturally.

· Begin with a focused plan
· There are very specific things we go over every week in our group. Quite times, personal growth and our marriages. If you don’t have a starting point then you’re more likely to end nowhere. Start out by making a list of things you want to see improvement on and then help each other form a plan of how you’re going to get it done. Communicate ground rules or a code of conduct, clearly emphasizing confidentiality and equal time.

· Make it a priority
Plan on a day and time that is good for everyone. Don’t let anything else get scheduled in your life during that time. Make it work!

When our group decided to take it to a deeper level I looked over a couple of great websites that really helped us formulate our plan. Here is one that was really good!

Just remember that this is not going to be perfect and run smoothly over night. It takes time to cultivate a trusting and lasting relationship. It’s a great privilege to be able to speak truth into someone’s life and see real change happen. Be patient with yourself and with those in your group, and always keep in mind that ultimately you’re accountable to God.


Heather said...


How come I can't Follow anybody's blogs?! There's supposed to be a little link thing on there at the bottom somewhere, but I can't find it on anybody's stuff! Gah!

Leslie Johnson said...

Heather, Do you mean the subscribe to the feed button? I haven't put one up yet, but hopefully soon. I am going to post every Mon, Wed and Fri (and sometimes on Sat). Hope this helps and I hope you can keep stopping by!